16 Struggles Only Pinays Dating AFAM Boyfriends Can Relate To

Dating someone from a different culture, especially an AFAM (A Foreigner Assigned in Manila) boyfriend, can be an exciting adventure. It comes with a unique set of challenges and rewards that can strengthen your relationship. In this article, we’ll explore the struggles of dating an AFAM boyfriend, provide explanations for each, and offer practical solutions to help you thrive together.

afam blog series banner 001 16 Struggles Only Pinays Dating AFAM Boyfriends Can Relate To AFAM, Foreigner Boyfriend, Foreigner partner, Pinay Dating AFAM

You Gotta Become a Tech Whiz

Explanation: Alright, so you’re in a long-distance relationship with your AFAM boyfriend, and let’s face it, the internet and high-tech gadgets are your lifelines. These digital tools are your secret sauce for staying connected when you can’t be together physically.

Solution: Embrace the digital dance! Instead of feeling overwhelmed, look at it as a fun opportunity to become a “Tech Whiz.” Dive into video calls, text messages, social media, and all the nifty apps that keep you two close. Don’t hesitate to ask your partner for tech tips; it’s like a cute way to bond and learn together.

Remember, technology isn’t just a bridge; it’s a playground for your love story. So, go ahead, rock those tech skills, and keep the sparks flying across the digital miles.

Tap into Your Inner Call Center Pro

Explanation: With international love, staying connected through frequent calls is a must. Sometimes, it feels like you’re running your own call center.

Solution: Get comfy with different time zones, and make those calls feel like daily adventures. Mix it up with video calls, voice messages, and surprise texts.

Remember, it’s not just about managing calls; it’s about creating a love story that’s stronger than distance. Keep those lines buzzing with affection and laughter, and you’ll master the art of long-distance love in no time!

Being Clingy and Wanting to Chat with Your AFAM 24/7

Explanation: When you’re in a relationship with your AFAM boyfriend, you might feel this irresistible urge to be together or chat non-stop. It’s like having a 24/7 hotline to your heart.

Solution: First, it’s essential to recognize that a bit of clinginess is okay; it shows how much you care. But, too much of anything isn’t always the best recipe. It’s about finding that sweet spot between ‘love bug’ and ‘independence champion.’

Balance is your secret weapon. Give each other space to breathe, nurture your individual interests, and trust in your connection. Instead of constant chats, create quality moments when you talk and spend time together. It’s all about keeping the romance alive while giving each other room to grow.

Being Jealous and Stirring Up Drama

Explanation: Jealousy can sneak into any relationship, and sometimes it stirs up some unwanted drama. You might feel a twinge of envy when your AFAM boyfriend hangs out with others or when you’re not the center of their world.

Solution: A dash of jealousy is pretty common, but you don’t want it to take over your relationship like a soap opera. The solution? Trust is your secret ingredient. Trust your partner and trust in your love.

Now, if jealousy knocks on your door, address it calmly and openly. Talk it out, share your feelings, and listen to each other. Remember, you’re a team, and drama is more fitting for the movies. So, keep your love story drama-free by sprinkling it with trust, understanding, and lots of love.

You’re the Tutor, Tour Guide, and Translator All Rolled into One

Explanation: Get ready for a triple treat. In your relationship with an AFAM boyfriend, you often become a teacher, tour guide, and translator. It’s like having your own culture crash course on speed dial.

Solution: Now, let’s make this a blast! Think of it as hosting an endless culture festival. Plan some cool cultural exchanges where you both take turns being the teacher and the explorer. It’s like scoring a golden ticket to travel the world together without leaving your living room.

Embrace the adventure and enjoy the journey of discovery. Share your traditions, learn about theirs, and relish the joy of being both the guide and the adventurer. It’s like a never-ending cultural rollercoaster, and it’s all about having a great time together

Time to Level Up Your Cooking Game

Explanation: Whether you want to wow your AFAM boyfriend with your culinary skills or they’re expecting a world food tour right in your kitchen, you might feel like it’s time to expand your cooking repertoire.

Solution: Time to turn this into a delicious adventure! Cook up a “Cultural Cuisine Challenge.” Dive into international recipes, and take turns being the chef extraordinaire. It’s not just about cooking; it’s a mouthwatering journey that lets you bond and explore each other’s tastes.

So, put on your apron, sharpen those knives, and get ready for a flavor-packed exploration. Who knows, you might discover some amazing dishes and create your own special recipes along the way.

He Could Be All About Work And No Fun

Explanation: Work, work, work – it’s all your AFAM boyfriend seems to talk about sometimes. You might find that your quality time together takes a backseat to his workaholic tendencies.

Solution: Encourage a healthy work-life balance. Plan outings and activities that let you both unwind and relish each other’s company. Sometimes, all it takes is a gentle nudge to help him see the joy in taking breaks and having some good old-fashioned fun.

Don’t be shy to suggest a spontaneous movie night, a relaxing day at the beach, or even a cozy dinner date. Your role as the ‘Fun Instigator’ is all about reminding him that life’s not just about work; it’s about creating beautiful memories together.

Watch Out for Opportunists in the Mix

Explanation: When you’re in a relationship with an AFAM boyfriend, there are folks out there who might see this as a chance for a financial windfall. These opportunists can come in various shapes and sizes.

Solution: So, what’s the game plan? Communication is your superhero here. Keep the channels open and honest when it comes to money matters. Have those heart-to-heart talks about potential pitfalls and establish some firm boundaries to shield your relationship.

Remember, your love should be a partnership built on trust and understanding, not a financial free-for-all. By setting these boundaries and staying open, you’re not just protecting your wallet; you’re also strengthening the bonds of your love story.

Those Judgmental Looks and Snarky Comments?
Can’t Dodge ‘Em.

Explanation: Ah, the classic ‘look and comment’ combo! So, you’re in a relationship with your AFAM boyfriend, and sometimes, the outside world gives you these disapproving glances and not-so-nice comments. It’s like they’ve got a cultural commentary corner going on.

Solution: You can’t control what others think, but you sure can control your reaction. Smile, nod, and keep walking the path of love. If you feel up to it, engage in friendly conversations, explaining your relationship’s awesomeness and the beauty of cultural diversity. Remember, love shines brighter than judgment, and your love story is worth all those ‘interesting’ looks and comments.

Communication Glitches Happen Now and Then

Explanation: It’s like a comedy of errors, but not always funny. Sometimes, when you and your AFAM boyfriend chat, language differences can create little communication hiccups. It’s like a game of ‘lost in translation.’

Solution: So, what’s the plan when these language glitches pop up? Picture them as fun challenges to level up your communication skills. Be patient and understanding. These moments are like secret training sessions where you both become communication ninjas.

Don’t be shy to ask for clarification when things get a bit foggy. Remember, in the world of love, misunderstandings are just tiny speed bumps, not roadblocks. So, embrace the quirks, share a laugh or two, and keep those conversations flowing

Sometimes, You’re Just Lost for Words…

Explanation: It happens to the best of us. There are moments in a relationship when words take a vacation, leaving you in a sea of silence.

Solution: So, what’s the magic trick when words decide to play hide and seek? It’s all about embracing the “Silence Symphony.” Instead of stressing over the lack of words, let your actions do the talking. Small gestures, like a warm hug, a loving smile, or just being there, can sometimes speak volumes more than words ever could.

Silence can be a beautiful part of your connection, a moment to simply enjoy each other’s presence. So, don’t fret when words take a hike; let the silence deepen your bond.

They Definitely Don’t Have a Money-Printing Machine

Explanation: Your AFAM boyfriend, despite being a real charmer, doesn’t have an endless flow of cash. Sometimes, people assume that dating an AFAM boyfriend means you’ve hit the jackpot, as if they have a magical money-making contraption up their sleeve.

Solution: So, here’s the deal – there’s this thing some people do where they spin heart-wrenching stories about sick family members or piling bills to squeeze money out of their AFAM boyfriends. But guess what? That’s not the path you want to take.

You see, your AFAM boyfriend doesn’t have a legal obligation to take care of you. This isn’t some courtroom drama; it’s a relationship, a connection built on love, not contracts.

Now, about asking for money, it’s not a terrible thing if it’s genuinely needed. But whenever you can, it’s a fantastic idea to roll up your sleeves and work for your own income. We get it, it’s often easier said than done, but overdoing the money requests might lead to misunderstandings.

What you definitely don’t want is for your AFAM boyfriend to see you as a gold-digger or someone trying to take advantage. So, protecting your dignity and the authenticity of your love is crucial. Your relationship is all about mutual respect, trust, and the bond you share. Keep it real, keep it strong, and keep the love at the heart of it all.

It Takes Some Time To Adjust To The Cultural Differences…

Explanation: When you’re dating an AFAM, you’re signing up for a colorful cultural adventure. There’s no doubt that you’ll run into a few bumps along the way. Cultural differences can be as surprising as finding a kangaroo in your backyard.

Solution: But don’t worry, these surprises can be tons of fun! The key here is patience and open-mindedness. Understand that both of you are coming from different backgrounds, and there’s no one “right” way of doing things. Instead of getting frustrated, get curious!

Ask questions, share stories, and find joy in the little things that make your cultures unique. Whether it’s a shared meal of adobo and hamburgers or trying your hand at each other’s traditional dances, embrace the quirkiness.

In time, those cultural gaps will turn into bridges that connect you even more. And remember, the journey is often just as exciting as the destination. So, enjoy the ride, keep an open heart, and savor the delicious mix of cultural flavors in your relationship.

They Are More Tolerant To Different Viewpoints

Explanation: You might notice that your AFAM boyfriend is a bit more chill when it comes to differing opinions. Filipinos, wonderful as they are, can sometimes be quite opinionated about certain matters.

Solution: First, let’s give a high-five to tolerance. It’s like having a superpower that makes your relationship stronger. Embrace the fact that you both bring unique perspectives to the table.

For example, I’m not into organized religion, and I usually vibe with those who have a critical mindset, just like me. But on the flip side, if I ever dropped the ‘I’m an atheist’ bomb on a Pinoy boyfriend’s mom, she might need a moment to catch her breath.

The magic word here is “respect.” Respect each other’s views, even if they differ. Use these moments as an opportunity to learn and grow. Share your thoughts and listen to theirs. It’s like a lively exchange of ideas, and it can be pretty darn exciting.

Remember, diversity of thought can be a fantastic gift in a relationship, as long as you treat it with care. So, keep that open, understanding spirit alive, and let your different opinions be the spice that makes your love story even more flavorful.

You’re Convinced Your Future Kids Will Be Gorgeous

Explanation: Ever scrolled through photos of those half-Filipino, half-foreigner celebrities and thought, “Yep, that’s gonna be my kids!” It’s fun to dream about having strikingly beautiful offspring, but let’s remember one thing: every child is a unique masterpiece.

Solution: What solution? You’re not entirely wrong in your daydreams. Your kids will indeed be a fantastic blend of both of you, inheriting the best of your genes. They’ll have your partner’s good looks and your charm, or vice versa. So, yes, your future little ones are likely to be stunners, and it’s okay to be excited about that. But remember, their true beauty lies in their unique personalities and the love they bring to your lives. So, expect gorgeous kids, but get ready for hearts of gold too.

You’ve Put in the Effort to Learn His Language and Teach Him a Bit of Filipino in Return

Explanation: Language plays a crucial role in understanding each other’s backgrounds. You’ve invested in learning his language and teaching him Filipino.

Solution: Keep nurturing this linguistic exchange, as it deepens your connection and appreciation for each other’s cultures. Language can be a bridge that enhances your bond.


Dating an AFAM boyfriend offers a one-of-a-kind journey filled with growth, understanding, and love. By addressing and overcoming these challenges, you can build a resilient, culturally enriched relationship that stands the test of time. Embrace the unique aspects of your love story, and let them be a source of strength and connection. Remember that love knows no boundaries, and with the right attitude and effort, you can overcome any challenge that comes your way.

Polly Amora

Polly Amora is the señorita behind GoldenIslandSenorita.Net. A corporate warrior by day, and a perpetual explorer by heart. She is a lifelong learner who is very outgoing, speaks four languages, loud & outspoken, and loves to have adventures in the mountains, on the beach, and in the city. You can throw her anywhere, and she'll handle it like a pro. Ice cream and bourbon are two of her weaknesses.

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