misconceptions about extroverts
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8 Misconceptions about Extroverts as Told by an Extrovert

Extroverts are perceived as noisy, outgoing, socially active individuals who like parties and being part of a crowd, and you will undoubtedly meet many of them when traveling. While this is correct, it is not the actual definition of extroversion. An extrovert is essentially a person who is energized by being among other people, and being alone for an extended amount of time tickles their restless bone. This is the polar opposite of an introvert who finds solitude energizing. To be honest, I believe that extroverts are misunderstood and have a bad reputation simply because we are more outspoken than introverts. Here are some of the most common misconceptions about extroverts.

8 Misconceptions about Extroverts as Told by an Extrovert

Me & my best friend, Cliff are both extroverted and I cannot handle it sometimes.

1. Extroverts don’t like quiet or alone time.

It’s not that all extroverts detest being alone, or that all introverted dislike people. Introverts and extroverts both need some interaction with others as well as some time alone. Each group, however, will find one of these depleting and the other replenishing.

I’m full blast on the extrovert scales but I also enjoy being alone (I love to read, and I absolutely loathe it when someone interrupts me when I’m reading), but if I’m alone for too long, I crave being around people again, which recharges my batteries. An introvert may like being around others, but extended social interaction may leave them feeling drained after a while.

2. Extroverts are always happy.

I don’t believe one personality is happier than the other. It all depends on the individual and how they choose to live their life. I do admit, though, that extroverts may appear happy while they are having fun since it involves a variety of activities. When you compare an introvert who is having fun by himself in a room playing computer games to an extrovert who is also having fun doing the things he likes, you could conclude that extroverts are happier, but they are both having fun and completely content.

3. Extroverts are natural flirts.

Extroverts like interacting with others, regardless of their gender. However, even when the extrovert’s motives are strictly platonic, this friendliness might be mistaken as flirting. We’re just bubbly, and we treat everyone the same way, from the server at a café to your 90-year-old grandmother. We want you to feel at ease in our company because when you’re relaxed, we’re relaxed.

Likewise, some extroverts can be a little ‘touchy-feely,’ which means we aren’t afraid to touch or be touched. They may not even be aware that they are touching others since it is so normal to them. But, in all honesty, it doesn’t imply we’re doing it on purpose, at least not for the majority of us.

4. Extroverts love public speaking

Yes, we talk a lot and maybe rather loud, but that doesn’t mean we like public speaking. Getting up and speaking in front of a room full of strangers (or even two strangers) might be daunting. To be honest, I become all self-conscious, and we all have the same worry of messing up something extremely important. Good public speakers, on the other hand, are able to control their nerves because they have practiced hundreds of times.

5. Extroverts need to be the center of attention.

Extroverts are more outgoing, confident, and sociable than introverts, thus they naturally draw more attention to themselves. However, not everyone enjoys being in the spotlight. I, for one, enjoy it when people pay attention to what I have to say, but most of the time I’d rather be the one who draws attention to others. Some of us simply want to be able to connect with people more.

6. Extroverts like small talk.

Starting conversations is stressful, and can be unnerving.  Some people handle it better than others.  And, when you’re really interested in someone, small talk is never worthless in our opinion. We despise awkward silences, and we don’t want to be disrespectful (by entirely ignoring you), so we push through our hesitancy and discomfort and simply do it. I can come up with a slew of responses that might easily lead to a discussion of intriguing ideas/beliefs. If you want to change the subject, believe me, we’re probably down.

7. Extroverts are insensitive.

Extroverts have a tendency to miss subtleties in situations and often interrupt others’ trains of thought/feeling. It’s not that the extrovert doesn’t care about others; it’s that they don’t slow down, calm down, and quiet their minds enough to notice and understand the subtle or not-so-subtle cues about how to approach others for conversations and other interactions. I am guilty of being slow to pick up on hints and passive-aggressive responses, so speak out if you want something from us extroverts.

8. Extroverts are somehow less intelligent than introverts.

I remember looking for actual data on intelligence among introverts and extroverts, but all I could find was the usual nonsense about who’s dumb, who’s smart, who’s weird, who’s boring, and so on. But let me say this: extroverts talk to and interact with a diverse range of people to broaden their perspectives and opinions. They learn by doing and talking through ideas and difficulties since putting yourself out there is the greatest way to learn. Multitasking comes naturally to the majority of us as well.

And, believe it or not, we appreciate hearing what you have to say, so don’t be scared if we bombard you with questions. It just shows that we are interested and would want you to tell us more.

The most common misconception about extroverts is that they are usually energetic, talkative, loud, and a little obnoxious. To be honest, such broad generalizations are unsettling, since they don’t provide the full picture. I know Extroverts who would rather be somewhere else than at a party. Everyone, including extroverts, has the ability to be quiet and thoughtful.

How do you feel about being among folks that are extroverted? Please let me know by leaving a comment below.

Polly Amora

Polly Amora is the general manager of a privately owned corporation in Manila, Philippines. She is a life-long learner who is extroverted to the extreme, knows four languages, is loud and outspoken, and enjoys adventure in the mountains, the beach, and the city. You can throw her wherever and she'll handle it like a pro. Her weaknesses include ice cream and beer.

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30 Comments

  1. Im an introvert so it was nice getting to know more about extroverts from reader this article. I love extroverts, especially when I’m in the mood to socialize. I think empathy is a major theme here and i find that heartwarming!

  2. My husband is an extrovert. He loves being around people but doesnt really need to be the centre of attention and is definitely much smarter than me :-p

  3. Jasmine Martin says:

    I think the alone time was the one that shocked me a bit. Most of the extroverts I know seem like they always want to do something and have some have mentioned that they didn’t like being alone like that.. but then again you did mention that extroverts don’t like being alone for extended periods of time.

  4. All media coverage is hogged by introverts so this was definitely refreshing.

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